well, like you care

Can we actually pinpoint an exact turning point in our lives. Frankly I don’t remember mine, or maybe I never ‘turn’ at all.

Anyway, when I was slaving myself all these years like an over-worked whore on weekend night, I had always thought of a defining day when I will finally settle down – work half-baked somewhere and spend more time with the kids.

As it is now, I am still dreaming of those days, and I don’t see them coming any time soon.

Well, maybe there is no such thing. The real world is a place where people work their asses off while kissing others.

Anyway, enough of that worldly crap. The real troubling deal here is I may not last very long here looking at the way things are going on with me now. I am so sick of being where I am now. Nothing on work or shit like that, it is just me – I am turning into a lazy bastard (hey…that’s a turning point!).

My weekdays are as good as gone, and the weekends are too damn short. I am just so fucking capital L.A.Z.Y! The 3 month of unemployment has really done wonders to my morale huh?

Ok lets get down to the many choices that I do have here – quit and relax, move on to something more interesting or just fuck-around. Though the last one seems more tempting, to live my life like that would be just too BN ‘MP’ish (except these people get paid). Seriously, I am thinking of quitting.

Why? fuck if I know. But one thing for sure though, life quality is not all about money.

I am meeting a friend of mine this evening who was and still is keen to get me onboard working on some interesting shit. May be I should revisit the option here.

Tadaa……

Well, it has been quite a while.

Not much from here, life is so so regimented since I started working (really miss my days of fucking around doing nothing, how I wish it could last much much longer…..).

My morning starts damn early. As early as I could possibly can. The thought of getting caught in traffic first thing in the morning is not really in my list of things to look forward to.

So this morning was no exception; I was right in the middle of KL before 7am. Parked my car and went around looking for a nice spot for breakfast and at the same time flipping papers. So far, no favorite spot identified just as yet, still looking.

Office starts at 8.30, yup an hour and half to fuck around. I would rather get in my office than hanging around somewhere else, but the faggot or whoever keeps the key for the office will not be here until 8.00 or 8.15am. Not only the office is locked before that, even the A/C for the whole fucking building is off. Cheap fucking building owner!

We finish off at 5.30pm but nobody seems to finish with whatever fuckin’ business there’re working on at that time though. It is always faces-on-monitors right about that time. So, a cool wanker like me will have to put up with this long stretch of another half an hour before I can fuck off at around 6.00pm.

I think a life like this will cut my life span by may be 50%.

Why? there’ve been countless cover ups..

No cover up in investigation says PM.

This statement has become a standard chorus coming from our PM. Notice?

If you’d notice, the same jingle has been hum by our PM right from Kugan case, Teoh case, latest politicians scandals, PKFZ and I don’t know what else will come up after this.

Strange huh?

I don’t know why but to me, saying this mantra over and over again whenever there are something cropping up needing investigation, makes me believe that there have been so many cover ups in the past.

Hope there is no cover up too on Dr Asri recent arrest by JAIS.

Missus said try DUKE honey…

I can’t even think of what pisses me off more than getting my ass stalled in a massive traffic jam.

Yesterday was another nightmare.

I tried a new route but it turned out worse than the route I took a day before – same shit. It just pissed me off big big time. But the funny part that I noticed was that, when I looked around at other motorists, nobody seemed as fuming-pissed as me though. They all looked so cool as if there was someone kneeling between the gas pedal and the steering giving them a good blowjob… I mean they were so relax and fuckin’ cool with the traffic jam and shit.

I feel like getting out of my car and give these ‘cool’ bastards a good slap for their unspeakable crime of being so cool even in a stalled traffic that hardly moved.

Today, I will try another to see whether I can escape, if not all, a little traffic nightmare.

I don’t know why am I bitchin’ here, fact is, that’s life in KL, and it has been like this for years no matter how good the infrastructure is getting. I guess those ‘cool’ people are so so used to this fact-of-life. As far I can remember, nothin’ changes even with fancy names like DUKE, SPRINT, NPE, AKLEH, LINK and whatnot coming into the picture.

I guess we just gonna have to wait till PUSSY (Projek Utara Selatan Y-interchange), DICK (Duta Inner Circle Kerinchi), SLUT (System Lebuhraya Utara Tengah), BUTTHEAD (Bandar Utama Taman Tun Hingga Damansara) and CUNT (Cheras Utara Nilai Tengah) to come in, hopefully these will ease the traffic a bit.

Oh well…I think I have bitched enough of this shit. Let’s move on, life’s like that.

My ass is numb

My first day yesterday was not that bad.

Warming my ass up all day doing things at one kiddy desk out in the corner where I was supposed to be sitting. A ‘kindergarten’ spot where I can barely move my ass without knocking on some shits around me. Wtf, am I complaining?? … nah.

At noon I walked to the nearby gym, great place, I’ve never been to such a gym as canggih as this one.

Travelling to work was a bitch though. I think I am gonna get old in the car. Imagine, an hour in the car driving to work and close to two freakin’ hours driving home yesterday. I was home when my kids were about ready to go to bed!

Shits like this get me thinking though.

I am sure there are other fuck-if-I-know ways to live our short life. I mean, getting the best of both worlds – making good money yet getting all the luxury of time to spend with your love ones. Wait, before you guys jump on me on this, I am tellin’ ya, this is no fairy tales, look around and you’ll see there ARE fuckers who live their life like that.

Man….I wish I could figure out how.

Yes boss, anything??

Today is already Sunday, a day before I get down on my knees and kiss asses. Cannot wait, I can already smell them from here…

Couple of days ago, I read one old fart suggested the minimum price of a pack of cigarette should’ve been tag at RM30. Now, old wanker here should’ve been tied to a pole and has his balls shot at. He was just speaking out of his pruned ass for sure cuz I don’t think he is so so concern about our health. I mean, for real, do you think he is so concern?? Check out those pigs at nasi kandar restaurants having their late night meals like there’s no tomorrow… veerryyy healthy.

The Star today said ‘Malaysian girls easily duped’. I’d say it is either these bimbos are just downright stupid cheap cunts or Malaysian men have small dicks cuz in most cases we read these sluts were easily con by Africans.

MCA’s unity plan needs time. Yeah right, dumbass criminals up there only realized “Unity” after both were bum out by the people. Now they are talking unity… Unity my ass!

Oh well, semua cari makan.

As for me, I have to pull my shits together and get warmed up for tomorrow.

Pickholes will soon get paid for bitchin’

I read today that Crocs warned the public not to be cheated into buying fake Crocs products. The warning is all over.

Well… I’d say we Malaysian would rather take that warning the other way around though.

We Malaysian just don’t want to be cheated into buying a real Crocs when there are cheap China made Crocs at pasar malam all over the country that look and feel exactly the same but at a fraction of the original price. I mean, don’t we just hate to be cheated this way – having spent 300RM on real crocs only to see an army of apeks and pakciks wearing them at pasar ikan. Just like that…

Anyway, lets get into a more interesting development.

Finaallllyyy…………in a week time, I will be getting back to bending over and kissing asses again. Nothing new though, cuz I have been doing that for the last 20 years.

Don’t worry I won’t bend as low as our renowned dumb columnist Awang-tak-Selamat who would write or do anything to be recognized. I am not as cheap as this BN-worshipped nigga for sure! Who is this fart anyway??

Ok back to my story, a firm has agreed to take me on board – not a bad package after lots of negotiations. Yup, lots and lots of negotiations – my conscience was crystal clear to the fact that I was not gonna haul my ass in a traffic rain forest every morning for peanuts!

My kids are a happy lot when they knew that I will be around (for the time being).

Where got?? Singapore can also lah…

I don’t exactly remember when the last time I was in Singapore. Probably many many years ago.

The last time I checked, Singaporean speaks either Chinese or English. But when I was there last weekend, fuck if I know just what lingo they speak, but I swear it was definitely not the English or Chinese that I am familiar with.

Little pipsqueak down there really invented their own language.

The other day when I read that our stoned-faced hallucinated education minister mumbled about implementing the teaching of Science and Mathematics in Bahasa for Year One students in 2011, a year ahead of schedule, I was just so glad.

At least we get to teach our kids appropriately and effectively the subjects of science and mathematics in Bahasa or vernacular languages, and English language in English class proper.

If the standard of English among our kids is deteriorating as what they’re saying now, just figure something out to improve the English lesson – improving the teaching approach, adding tools, getting better qualified teachers or whatever ways rather than opting for a simpler approach of extending the usage into other subjects. It could screw everything up.

Believe me you ‘Science and Mathematics in English’ advocates out there – if you listen to just how the majority of Singaporeans speak English (assuming they’re speaking English) , you may want to get real serious about getting our kids to be taught by English qualified language teachers. And not just by any science or mathematics teachers who are obviously not trained to use the language to teach.

Transformer is back!

Remember these two words – “Reform” and “Transform”.

Cuz you gonna hear these two words awfully over and over in the next couple of days.

Don’t ask what exactly those words are or just how the heck do they measure them, cuz I don’t think none of these dimwit clown-in-read know exactly the answer.

But you’ll see the super impact of these two words on our asskissing delegates – it looks nothing less than a shot of orgasm on their faces whenever they hear their leaders chanting these two words in their speech.

There is no better fairy tales than UMNO General Assembly. I am dead serious – you should really read all about it. I love reading all about it.

So enough of this crap, go out, buy a paper and enjoy the fairy tales.

Now back to reality. It has been a long two months since I was paid for bitching around. Yesterday, I went for an interview. Well, nothing to jump up and down about, just an interview with an old friend with a bigger title bold-written on his business card. I’d say it went quite well – but going well has zero correlation with getting hired with a heavy paycheck – it just went well.

Oh well… we’ll see. At the same time, I am also waiting for feedback from few places that I have submitted my proposals earlier.

Anyway, life is great. I am free. People who bitch about having so many things to do in so little time will probably hate me for this. Yeah, cuz I’ve got time man. I mean super ample time just about to fuck around doing nothin’.

Hit the gym this morning after two days of sitting on my sorry ass – that just felt soooo good. Missus dropped me there and I jogged home right after that.

Chinese opera

MCA really got balls. I have to salute these people. Seriously.

Or maybe I should not though. Probably the so called ‘third force’ has paid the right price to delegates to kick the two jokers ass out.

Whatever it is, I am overwhelmed. It is very un-UMNO. I don’t think the Malays have the balls to do such a thing even with the right money thrown on the table. Tak baik menderhaka!

This Chinese opera will make an interesting read in days to come. I like it.

On Bagan Penang, the result was no surprise to me. We know damn well that little creature is so popular there. They just wanted to win – fuck the suspension and vote-buying grand daddy stories! People forget.

Oh ya, I forgot to mention the open house we hosted over the weekend. It was one heck of a good time I had – meeting old friends and relatives. Though some could not make it, I am happy that most that I invited turned up.

Tak sangka pulak Ifa Sugul has been my blog silent reader…